Sometimes you make the 15-minute drive from St. Louis to Sauget, Illinois, for breathtaking views of the Arch and the glittering downtown lights at dusk.
Other times you drive to Sauget to catch a Gateway Grizzlies baseball game while fulfilling your inner fat kid fantasy of gorging on a juicy, tantalizing bacon cheeseburger sandwiched between two glazed, melt-in-your-mouth Krispy Kreme doughnut halves.
And sometimes, you drive to Sauget to do both.
Think about a quarter-pound all-beef patty topped with thick, crisp bacon and sharp, melty cheddar cheese. That alone has us salivating. But when that greasy burger is served on a soft, caramelized doughnut bun, the velvety glaze oozing down into the drippy cheese, it suddenly becomes a salty-sweet slam out of the park.
Is it genius? You bet.
Is it over the top? Absolutely.
Does it increase your odds of cardiovascular disease? To be determined.
Nevertheless, four taste testers shoved their health concerns aside to sink their teeth into this gooey, artery-clogging delight at GCS Ballpark. What could possibly be bad about a doughnut burger that sounds so good? Unfortunately, as it turns out, a lot.
Here’s how our panel weighed in.
“It sucked. Highly disappointing.”
“This is not in fact Baseball’s Best Burger. The problem lies in the overly processed patty.”
“Maybe if it hadn’t been sitting under a heat lamp for Lord knows how long, we wouldn’t have suffered through bites of floppy bacon, rubbery cheese and a disintegrating doughnut. Baseball’s Best Burger should be made to order.”
“The concept is flawless, but the execution is crap. On that note, I don’t think any execution, regardless of how well done, will ever truly match our expectations as to what a doughnut burger should be. It simply is untouchable.”
As previously mentioned, the limp microwavable bacon, sweaty slice of cheddar and doughnut that was practically decomposing into the burger made this a real disappointment. As for the patty itself? We’ve had better hamburgers in school cafeterias.
No way to sugarcoat this — we’ve never been more underwhelmed by the presentation of a dish. The only thing Country Bob’s Grill got right on this baby’s looks? The char marks on the inverted Krispy Kremes.
In a world where obesity reigns supreme, why settle for a sesame seed bun when you can have your cheeseburger dripping down the sides of an airy, sugary, yeast-raised doughnut? If you enjoy the coupling of salty and sweet, you’ll love this concept. It’s sinfully delectable.
For just $5, we can’t complain too much about a bad burger, especially since you’d be hard pressed to find anything edible for that cheap in a baseball stadium. But then again, for $5, we could make our own Baseball’s Best Burger, and we’d be willing to bet ours would be a helluva lot better than this sorry excuse for a calorie splurge.
Similar to the evening filled with much fanfare and anticipation of the unknown for this group of first timers, the infamous Baseball’s Best Burger may best be likened to the Grizzlies’ field performance that evening … four hits, four errors and zero runs scored, resulting in a 16-0 shellacking by the Joliet Slammers.
Our advice for those still wanting to taste what all the Baseball’s Best Burger fuss is about? BYOB(urger).